I took the kids to see Coraline today. I thought it would be a fun Friday afternoon activity. I surprised the boys at school, picking them up about 20 minutes before their day was over. We went right to the theater, got popcorn and snacks...Icee's even. It was awesome.
We own The Nightmare Before Christmas, after all. We love that movie. Pumpkin Jack is a legend in our house. The Corpse Bride was a little odd and I wasn't very thrilled with it. We still haven't seen Monster House. And, Egor was just plain stupid. Don't bother. Still, I decided to give Coraline a chance. It wasn't the 3D version. I was bummed at first. Only at first. At some point during the movie I was very relieved that we weren't watching it in 3D. I'll tell you about that in a minute.
It should have been a clue when Landee texted me and said "I heard Coraline is a skosh freaky." I was a little too busy marveling at yet another example of Landee's fabulous way of describing things to pay too much attention to what she was really saying. I'd already purchased the tickets anyway. Then later, as I was getting ready to leave the house, my sister said that my other sister said that it had some weird stuff in it. She warned me about a particular scene and I was watching out for it.
For a little background, Coraline lives in a very old house with her parents who pay absolutely no attention to her and are always telling her to go away because they're busy. She finds a little door that goes into another world where there's another set of parents who love her and make her good food, blah, blah, blah. In this other world she visits the 'other' neighbors and stuff too. One set of neighbors are these two old ladies. In their house there are posters of them when they were younger. Beautiful, not wearing very much. I couldn't tell what the posters were. Circus performers? Dancing girls? Whatever.
The problem came when Coraline went to visit the old ladies in the 'other' world. They're in a theater doing some kind of show. And ---- nearly naked. Oh yes. Old, VERY LARGE 'girls' and nearly naked. Are you kidding me? The first lady is in a mermaid costume. She has some sort of a bustiee and there are a few rolls showing underneath. Phew, I thought. If that's the dancing part I'd been warned about...I can handle that. Nope. That wasn't it. The curtains part and here comes the second old lady. She has the biggest 'girls' I've ever seen on an animated character (or even real person, for that matter). She's wearing, ahem, a small bikini bottom and blue flowery pasties. PASTIES!!!!! No bra. No jacket. No nothing!!!!! Just PASTIES!!!! Is this a kids movie? What the HECK is going on? Could you imagine those large 'girls' with only pasties on them in 3D!?!?!?!?
After that scene, I wasn't really that impressed with the movie anymore. Just waiting for it to be over. My kids liked it. But, I think what they liked more was getting to go to a movie and having popcorn for dinner.
Don't go see it. Don't rent it. Don't buy it. And to those who made the movie? FOR SHAME!!!!! Those stinkin' movie people.