Friday, June 26, 2009

I'm a Loser!

NEVER type the words "Lose Weight Fast" in Googler if you don't want to be inundated with a bunch of scammy garbage. I kind of knew that already, but somehow got sucked into some thing about Dr. Oz and Oprah and Rachel Ray. I decided to try this Acai stuff that's supposed to help you lose weight. My friend takes some form of it and was telling me that she likes what it's doing for her. So - I signed up for the "RISK FREE" trial offer - just pay $4.95 for shipping. Uh huh. SUUUUUURRRRRRRRE!

This was about 10 days ago. I still haven't received any product. I decided to look around online and see what was up and I found a guy talking about it being a scam, etc. So, I decided to look further. Here's a little info in the fine print. I added the italics and stuff.

"You will have 15 days from your original purchase date to decide if Acai Advanced is right for you. If you are enjoying Acai Advanced do nothing and at the end of your 15 day trial period you will be charged the low rate of only sixty four dollars and ninety five cents (notice no numbers?) for the bottle you received. Approximately 30 days from your original purchase date and every 30 days thereafter you will be sent another 1 month supply of Acai Advanced and your credit card on file will be billed the Healthy Lifestyle’s Member's Only price of sixty four dollars and ninety five cents plus nine dollars and ninety five cents for shipping and handling for a total of seventy four dollars and ninety five cents. That's 30% off the regular price for a 1 month supply of Acai Advanced. You may cancel your membership at any time by simply contacting customer service. Please remember, most customers see most noticeable results by using Acai Advanced consistently for 3 months. You may contact our customer service department via postal mail, email, or by using our toll free phone number. Customer service hours are between the hours of 9 am till 5 pm PST, Monday through Friday."

Oh but there's MORE! Not only did I get signed up for this lovely 30% off the regular price, but I got automatically signed up for The Live Lean For Life Weight Loss Management Plan Trial. Oh YES!

"Try Live Lean For Life absolutely free for three weeks. You will have 20 days from your original purchase date to decide if Live Lean For Life is right for you. If you are enjoying Live Lean For Life do nothing and at the end of your 20 day trial period and every 30 days thereafter you will be charged the low rate of only Twenty four dollars and ninety five cents (still no numbers) to your credit card on file. You may cancel your membership at any time by simply contacting customer service....phone number 888-272-6483."

So, first I called Acai. Here's the deal, you gize. I lied. I told them my husband lost his job. Why? Cause one of my friends was saying that when her husband lost his and she started cancelling things - she was amazed at how instantly helpful and willing they were to do it. There wasn't any arguing. They just didn't want to mess with someone who wasn't going to have money. Taaadaaaaaaa! I tried it. They gave me the cancellation number and I'm so lucky - I only have to return 30 of the pills and I only have to pay for the shipping for that. Oh, but wait -- I still don't have them, do I? Hmmmmmm.

Then, I called Live Life Lean or whatever it is. That number listed put my on hold for over 10 minutes. During that time, I was researching them online and found another number. I don't think anyone would have ever picked up the first one. I called this other number and they couldn't find any record of me in their system. I hope that's true. If they charge me anything, I'll have to dispute it and that's a big pain in the hind-end.

Eneeeewaaaaaaaay.......I'm a loser. I got sucked in and scammed and luckily (hopefully) got out of it before they started charging me a bunch of money. Next plan -- which I might just do -- is call the bank and get a new card number. Cancel the current one. I keep thinking about the story of the camera - you know who you are - and the husband rushing home in the middle of church to get online and save the day. My Honey is probably shaking his head at me.

I guess if you want to try Acai - go to the vitamin store or something and just buy it.

ON ANOTHER TOPIC:

How about that Michael Jackson thing, eh? I think he killed himself, or got his 'personal physician' to help him. Can you think of any one person who was more miserable to just exist as himself? Poor fella. Mark my words people. I can't wait to find out the autopsy results. At least - if they tell us the truth.

Who doesn't love a good conspiracy theory now and again??

Now can we stop hearing about him on the news already? Goll! I feel bad that Farah got so swept under the rug.

Mkay. Moving on. I've got to go get that lovely boot thing for my foot this morning.

yay.

3 comments:

Landee said...

a) can't wait to see your new boot

b) Those scams are the worst! I hate the ones that send you a check and if you cash it you're in a 10 year contract where they withdraw $200/month and crap like that. They should all be jailed.

c) An assisted suicide? I like that conspiracy....

Memzy said...

I like where you're going with this. Conspiracy theories are my new fave hobby.

Pic of boot pleasekthanks.

The McLaughlin's said...

Stay away from anything that says "instant gratification". Not worth it!